If anyone has told you that relationships are easy, they are lying to you. Pardon my french but relationships are so damn difficult. You are blending two completely different lives together to coexist and love one another. On the outside relationships seem glamorous, they are all happy and romantic. Yes, those things exist in relationships, but every relationship goes through difficulties. These are some things that you have to learn to do to keep your relationship healthy.
Learn How The Other Lives
When you get into a relationship with someone, you do not really know what their daily life is like. You have to learn their personality and their habits, both the good and the bad. You learn their quirks and what makes them, them. You learn about their family and their likes and dislikes. You have to learn everything about the other person, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Once you know everything about them, you will be able to start to adjust your lifestyle to theirs and vice versa.
You can help them learn more about themselves as well. There are probably things about them that you notice that they do not. You can help strengthen their good traits, and encourage them to quit their bad habits. Challenge them in the best ways possible, to help them be the best version of themselves that they can possibly be.
Love Their Flaws
Nobody is perfect. Every human being is flawed in some way. We all have things about us that are imperfect, that is what makes us human. There is no such thing as a perfect human, but there is a perfect person for you. The perfect person for you will have their flaws, but if you love them, you will also love their flaws and imperfections.
I know that I am flawed and if I am being honest, I can be insecure at times because of my flaws, but I choose to try my best to stay confident in who I am. You have to learn to love and accept yourself for who you are before anyone else can love you. And trust me, they will love your flaws and you will love theirs, it is what makes them, them and what makes you, you.
Hold Them Accountable
Hold them accountable for their actions. Encourage them to ditch their bad habits and encourage and support their good habits. When they do something that you are not happy about, tell them. Let them know what you do not like and how they can do better. Encourage them to be a better version of themselves and support them and hold them accountable to get to be that person and stay that way. Your partner is a reflection of you, so help them to make good decisions and be open and honest with them about everything. I know, sometimes it can be hard to tell someone that you do not like something that they do or something about them, but how are they supposed to fix it if they are unaware? If they truly love you, they will be thankful that you pointed it out and will do something about it. This is a true test of your relationship. You will be able to tell by their actions if they are serious. If they truly love you, they will want to be better for you.
Forgiveness Is A Must
Humans disappoint. It is inevitable. Your partner will hurt your feelings or make you angry or upset. You will get into arguments. It will all happen at some point. But to be able to get through it, you have to learn to forgive. You may have to agree to disagree at some points. You will not see eye to eye on every situation. You are two different people, but you have to make a conscious decision to forgive and move past the situation. Always remember it is not you against them, it is you two against the problem. Work together to overcome it. Talk it out and forgive one another always, no matter how badly they mess up.
Communication Is Key
Communication is probably the most important thing in a relationship. You have to be able to let the other person know everything they need to know and you need to be there to listen to them when they need to tell you the same. You need to communicate about the little things and the big things. The more you communicate, the easier it will be to be on the same page and you will be happier in your relationship. Know when it is appropriate to talk and when you just need to be there to listen. Communication is so important to know how the other is feeling and how you can help one another. You are a team and need to work together, but you can’t do that if you don’t communicate.
Choose Each Other Daily
Some days will be more difficult than others. You will have a hard time loving them sometimes. But you have to choose them every day, regardless of what they have done or what obstacles you face. Love is not a feeling, but a choice. You will come out of the honeymoon phase at some point. You may get annoyed with them more easily, but always remember why you love them and what made you fall in love with them in the first place. Choose to love them even when they are less than lovable, because you would want the same done for you.
Relationships are not easy. They look glamorous on the outside, but on the inside they may be fighting battles that you do not have any idea about. Forgive, communicate and love one another every day and you will be your happiest selves and your relationship will only grow stronger.
